I hope I can begin to convey to you all today the absolute disgust and disappointment I am feeling for my parents, Jim and Tina.
I am sitting here and it is January 5, 2011, and we still have not celebrated Christmas with them.
This is the first time in 37 years that we did not get together with them on Christmas.
37 whole years.
In addition to that little fact, this is most likely the last Christmas in our house.
Do you want to know why we didn’t get together?
My dad was sick.
Don’t give me an “awww that poor guy.” Don’t feel sorry for them.
For those of you who don’t know, my dad had a kidney transplant 5 years ago. This means that his immune system is very weak and he is very prone to illness. Not to mention that if he does get sick, he has a very hard time of ridding himself from that illness.
My parents had to take a class on how to stay healthy, while they were at the Mayo Clinic after his transplant.
Washing hands, using Purell, staying away from large groups of people and, especially, children have been engrained into my parents.
My dad will proudly show everyone how to use a public bathroom without touching anything.
Heck, those people even buy moisturizing hand sanitizer a case at a time!
They are insanely diligent about staying healthy.
So 5 days before Christmas while I am nursing 2 kids with ever-so-slight colds back to health so that they don’t infect anyone, do you want to know what my parents were doing?
They went to every museum and mall in the metro area whooping it up.
But that isn’t so bad.
They topped off their weekend at the casino and just for fun they decided to eat at the buffet.
You do not want to know the conversation that transpired between me and my mom after I learned that little tidbit of information.
Tyler is pretty sure my dad is trying to kill himself. After all, who in their right mind would touch all of those serving spoons that everyone else has touched and NOT wash their hands afterwards?
Someone with a death wish, that’s who.
So he was sick for Christmas and then sick still for our make-up day on the 27th. He was well on the 30th but had to cancel because…
wait for it…
He had to VACUUM and all of that vacuuming gosh darn done him in and he relapsed so we couldn’t get together yet again.
It’s nice to know what his priorities are.
Tonight is the night we are supposed to get together to be all merry and bright.
Here’s hoping my dad doesn’t decide to go lick the toys at our local Urgent Care. At this point nothing would faze me.
Do your parents ever do anything so idiotic that you shake your head in disgust, too?